A dentist I know has been trying to decide whether to leave her practice for two years now. Same conversation every time. Same circles. Same dead ends.
So I asked her, “have you ever been stuck in a corn maze?”
She looked at me like I had three heads.
But hear me out.
You're in there. Turning left. Turning right. Hitting dead ends. Backtracking. You've been in there so long you start to wonder if this is just your life now — you live here, among the corn, with the crows.
But then imagine someone hands you a drone.
You look at the screen and realize something almost embarrassing.
You've been walking around the exit the entire time.
The answer was right there. You just couldn't see it because you were too deep inside it.
That's most of us with our biggest problems.
We're running circles inside the maze — burning out, white-knuckling through years of a career we're not sure we even want anymore, wondering why we feel stuck despite doing everything right — and we keep looking for some complex, extravagant solution.
When all we needed to do was zoom out.
There's actually a name for why this is so hard.
Researchers at the University of Waterloo discovered something fascinating. When people were asked to reason through someone else's problem, they were calm, balanced, and wise. When asked to reason through their own problem? Biased. Defensive. Stuck.
Psychologists named it Solomon's Paradox — after King Solomon, the biblical king famous for his extraordinary wisdom. Solomon could solve anyone's problems with perfect clarity. His own life? 700 wives, 300 concubines, a kingdom that collapsed after he died. Brilliant advisor. Terrible at taking his own advice.
Sound familiar?
You've probably done this for a patient. They come in stressed, overwhelmed, convinced their situation is hopeless. You listen for two minutes and immediately see exactly what they need to do. Clear as day.
Then you go home and spiral for three hours about your own career, your finances, your life direction — and can't find the exit to save your life.
The fix is something researchers call self-distancing — creating just enough separation from your situation to think about it clearly. It sounds simple because it is. But we almost never do it.
Instead of asking "what should I do?" — ask "what would I tell my best friend to do if they were in my exact situation?"
That's it. That's the zoom out.
The moment you step outside your own story and look at it like a trusted friend would, the fog starts to lift. The exit appears. You realize you already knew the answer — you just needed to stop being inside the maze long enough to see it.
The wisdom you offer other people is the same wisdom you have about your own life. You just haven't given yourself the distance to access it.
💊 This Week's Prescription:
Pick the one thing you've been going in circles on. Ask yourself: what would I tell my best friend to do if this was their problem?
Write the answer down. Then take your own advice.
Hit reply and tell me what came up. I read every one.
— Dr. Mike